Recognition Gone Bad

Why do we bully others?

Why do some people feel bullied and others just laugh?

What is destructive?

What is constructive?

My girlfriend and I decided to offer entrepreneurship in Drayton valley to our local school students.  We printed flyers and mailed them to every student ‘s home that were between grades 9 and 12.  Junior Achievement offers many financial literacy programs that volunteers teach in schools.  We wanted to teach entrepreneurship so we chose to offer the Junior Achievement Company Program where students learn to start a company, produce a product, take it to market and then wrap up the company all in 17 weeks.  This is a really fun well designed program that is taught to 90,000 students worldwide.  (We can help you start a program in your community)

Things were going pretty well and them wammo…a reported incident of bullying!  Dealing with that was not part of the curriculum.  Being a graduate of 21^st Century Leadership, and a graduate of On Course for facilitators and a life long learner I scrambled for a mature way to deal with this without raising defenses and making it personal, seeking to create value for all participants.

So for that evening, we defined BULLYING as “getting your need for recognition met destructively” by making someone else look bad so you could feel better…basically getting your need for recognition met destructively. 

First, we all agreed that at some level we had a need for recognition.

Then we broke into small groups and talked about hurtful or mean things we had done.

We agreed that for the short term we might have felt powerful, but we never did feel very good for very long.

Second we brainstormed a list of several ways we could get our need for recognition met constructively:

1. Be kind to others

2.  Do a favor for others

3.  Just do things that need doing

4.  Volunteer

5.  Teach Sunday School

6.  Babysit for free

7.  Do things without being asked

This is a group of students who are in grades 9-12…their list was lengthy and amazing.

Then we sat each kid up at the front one at a time and got the other kids to say all the nice things they could think about this person and gave each of them their list…this process may be uncomfortable for some…but educate and encourage them to relax and enjoy the recognition and say thank you, not deflect the recognition.

Then they took their list of words and made themselves an affirmation: 

I am a kind, peaceful passionate leader!  I am!

Next…they each read their affirmation out loud.  No comments, no words, 1 person at a time.  When everyone was finished we stood smiling in silence for a minute.  The energy level in the room just kept rising. 

Our final comment was for each person to invest the time in them-selves to get their need for recognition met constructively. ALWAYS.

Passion

Our duty, as men and women, is to proceed as if limits to our ability did not exist. We are collaborators in creation. 

Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

            When I was a little girl, I was told that my imagination was the limit.  As I grew up I began to believe that was fictional, thinking surely not everything you imagine can come true.  What if you imagine flying? Well so did Orville and Wilbur Wright who flew the first powered airplane.  What if you imagine walking on the moon? Turns out, that is what Neil Armstrong imagined.  Neither of these tasks had been accomplished until these people set out to do what was then the unthinkable.  Whether it is something astounding like these examples or something more personal, it does not matter.  However what separates the men from the boys, so to speak, when it comes to seeing your dreams become reality is simply described: Passion.

            Passion is defined as an intense, driving, or overmastering feeling or conviction.  I believe passion is a notion in your heart, a tie to something you feel so strongly about that you will go any distance to achieve.  When you have a burning desire in your heart, something so emotionally tied it brings tears to your eyes and brings small bumps to the surface of your skin - that is passion.  That passion translates directly into motivation.  Another example we are familiar with is Mother Theresa.  Her passion was evidently compassion and caring.  This lady, for over forty five years, dedicated her life to caring for sick, orphaned, poor and dying.  Look at the legacy she has left behind.  

            When we follow our heart, the burning desire of passion and those notions that we feel are right with no explanation, is when amazing things transpire.  It is when the unthinkable happens and the impossible becomes possible.  Here is another great example of two people who followed their passion. Through some undesirable circumstances these two people have changed winter sports for the better.  I hope you enjoy this video as much as I did and I hope you take the time to listen to the notions in your head and the feelings in your heart. 

Let Your Light Shine

The most important opinion in life is that of the person who is looking back at you in the mirror.   The dreams and ideas you hold have the potential to come true.  Usually the thing that prevents such desires to turn into reality is fear.  Think of the last time you were afraid or nervous to do something.  Once the event was over, how did you feel? Most likely you felt lighter; like a weight was lifted off you.  You moved towards the fear and nervous feelings and were rewarded with accomplishment.  Most of the time, fear is generated by the unknown.  How will you know if you don’t take the step?  The person who is looking back at you in the mirror has a dream or an idea worth pursuing.  How long can you, or will you, look in the mirror and wonder before you take the steps into the unknown.  Life starts at the edge of your comfort zone. The greatest accomplishments in the world all started with one step, the confidence in your dream or goal, and most importantly yourself. 

The video below is a great example of a lady who had a dream.  She knew in her heart what she wanted and did not listen or fall victim to others negative thoughts and opinions.  As you watch this video, pay attention to the opinions of the people prior to her singing.  This did not change her confidence or her dream.  There is a valuable lesson at hand.  People have the right to their own opinion, just as you have the right to yours.  It is your choice to allow others opinions to affect where you go in life.  Follow your dreams and listen to those who encourage.  Mind none to those who discourage.  It’s kind of like the quote “People can only drive us crazy if we give them to keys”.  People can only discourage our dreams if we let them.  I hope you enjoy this video.  It gives me chills every time I watch it.  It’s a remarkable example of a lady and her dream to sing. 

Let no one dull your sparkle because we are all here to shine our own light.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxPZh4AnWyk

Your Are Your Own Best Asset!

For many of us positive thinking has become a way of life. For that we thank, in large part, Pat Vos. She has opened many doors to learning and personal growth for everyone within the company.  As I continue to learn and grow I have consulted different people, read numerous books and been to different courses.  A major theme that trails through all of them is surrounding yourself in a positive environment.  Listen, read and discuss things of a positive nature or topics which will increase your knowledge.  This creates the perfect environment for growth and development.  In a sense, what you’re doing is learning and developing a larger perspective on life, allowing you to view things from multiple "eyes" so to speak.  

This video is one of my favorite things to watch.  Whether I am having a good day or an average day, it seems some part in this video helps me out at that moment.  Every time I watch it I am able to take something new away from it.  Steve Jobs was a creator, inventor, entrepreneur and inspiration for many. This speech is a gift of his experience and wisdom from his trials and tribulations that he faced through his journey on earth.  Jobs reveals more about himself here in this speech for anyone who is unfamiliar with it. 

The saying, “you can’t see the forest through the trees”, can pertain to life.  When something arises, an issue or challenge it can sometimes be difficult to know which way to go.  In most cases, we are not the first ones to go through that situation. In all cases, someone else has been through something similar. Allow them to help, allow their experience to teach them AND teach you! One way of doing this is watching different videos and read books.  Take time to expand your brain power and wisdom.  You are your own best asset, invest in it.    

I hope you enjoy this video and watch for more to come!

NAEO 2012 Annual Conference

Cheryl and I just got back from the 2012 NAEO (National Amtelco Equipment Owners) 28^th Annual Conference. As always, what a great experience! It never ceases to amaze me how helpful and willing to share knowledge the people in this industry are. In the spirit of sharing information, I thought I’d do my best to summarize our experience – both at the conference and our travel adventures!

An overview of this year’s conference highlights:

• Reconnecting with friends and industry colleagues - as well as making new ones! 
• Keynote speaker David Fabricius is an internationally renowned YPO-WPO and Fortune 500 corporation speaker. He offered outstanding leadership perspectives, productivity strategies and success strategies in his wonderful presentation. He has inspired us to “Raise Our Sails”.
• We got some face time with Amtelco and other software providers. We asked for some changes and improvements for the programs we use and we are getting some of them right away! We also got to hear about the new products that are available and what is coming down the pike!
• There were great Operations, Sales/Marketing and Technical breakout sessions as well as the wonderful Round Tables discussions!
• As the saying goes - location, location, location! If you haven’t been to the Cosmopolitan in Las Vegas, it is a beautiful hotel. It is spacious, urban and lots of fun!

An overview of the technical and software information we learned:

• SQL and Crystal Reporting are the ‘cat’s meow’. You are able to customize the information and design of the reports you create.
• New ways of designing reports, and key questions to ask ourselves.
• No matter how many times I attend the Amtelco Infinity maintenance session, I still take away new ideas and information.
• Social Media is just like technology – it’s ever changing, and I still always learn something new each time I attend a session or course.
• New ideas to help engage our remote attendees at staff meetings.
• Ways to possibly streamline our staff meetings a bit more.
• New ideas on how to utilize the layout of our Infinity software as well as programming it.

A few of the key messages presented in some of the sessions:

• Commit to solve the identified areas of opportunity.
• Value an employee’s opinion, but challenge them to think outside of the box.
• Remember to make the people you interact with feel like they are the most important thing to you at that moment.
• Create an open and positive environment for your employees.
• The answers lie in the reports.
• Be open and truthful no matter how hard it is.
• Don’t undervalue the time of a programmer.
• Managers speak to people’s heads and leaders speak to people’s hearts.

Other things we learned on our adventure:

• Cheryl and I probably shouldn’t travel together
• Double and triple check your flight information
• Have a third party check your flight information
• Go online and  carefully check your flight information
• Being polite when asking about the occupancy of a table does not always have positive results
• West Jet employee Pedro is very helpful and considerate
• Following pedway etiquette is appreciated
• It’s disappointing when family restaurants close before 7pm in an airport
• When stuck in an airport, Travelocity can save you!
• Hotel roller coasters are tons of fun – but not the smoothest ride!
• To get something for free, just enter: makeitright
• The view from the Stratosphere is absolutely breathtaking at night!
• Seeing Motley Crue live has turned me into a much bigger fan :D

 All in all it was a great trip! Thanks to everyone at the conference and of course everyone at the office who covered for us while we were gone!